Close to the Heart
Genuine connections can feel hard to come by.
In the hustle and bustle of our lives, it can feel pretty lonely. Especially when we imagine deep connection, or intimacy, being something incredibly lofty, or overly romantic, but moments of closeness show up all throughout our lives without our noticing.
Think of the shared look with a coworker in a Zoom meeting or a night sitting on our couch with a friend doing absolutely nothing. Understanding and cultivating different kinds of intimacy in our lives can help us feel closer to the people, or the world, around us.
The Many Types of Intimacy
Intimacy can be generally defined as a meaningful connection with ourselves or others. But this can show up in a lot of different ways. Here are a few examples of intimacy to consider:
Intimacy can be the close connection between people, especially when we feel that strong sense of shared understanding.
Intimacy can be vulnerability. A space or relationship where we can shed our masks, and find comfort in being seen and accepted.
Intimacy is the silent language of trust, spoken through gestures, shared secrets, and the unspoken understanding.
Intimacy can be the experience of when our emotions or even our thoughts synchronize with someone else.
Intimacy can be physical proximity - a hug, a cuddle, or sharing a workspace with someone.
INCREASE CONNECTION BY LOOKING INWARD
The most profound intimacy often begins within.
It's about taking the time to understand ourselves, embracing our vulnerabilities, honoring our needs, and listening to that inner nudge towards the things that interest you. Think of it as simply “meaningful connection with ourselves.” How could you create more of this in your life?
Consider the following ways to feel closer to yourself:
Notice Your Thoughts
One of the simplest ways to get to know ourselves better is to pay attention to the conversations we’re having in our head every day. Take a moment, even right now, to sit quietly and notice, without judgment, what’s going on inside your head.
Spend Time on Your Interests
Pursue activities and interests that genuinely captivate your curiosity. Remember, its not important if you’re “bad” at it.
Embrace Stillness & Silence
When we carve out the time to get quiet and still, we create space for our inner voice to speak. Listen to your inner wisdom; trust your intuition and let it guide you.
Set Intentions
There are two parts to setting intentions:
Part 1: What is the inner experience that you would like to create more of? Inside of you - your mind, body and heart?
Part 2: What would you like to be experiencing more out in the world? Outer events, things that are happening around you, out in your world. Remember to create them in present tense.
For example: "I am gracefully accepting and letting go of that which I cannot change and experiencing more connection to myself."
CULTIVATING CLOSE RELATIONSHIPS AT WORK
Just like intimacy with ourselves, cultivating close relationships in the workplace requires effort.
But the effort is usually not equal to the reward. Enhanced feelings of intimacy in the workplace can improve professional identity, team productivity, workplace culture, and individuals’ overall job satisfaction.
How can you cultivate more of this intimate connection within your professional life? Consider these ideas for helping create a workplace environment enriched with genuine connections and shared purpose.
Open Group Meetings w/ Check In Questions
A quick check-in question provides a chance to learn more about your colleagues and prioritize human connection over work priorities. Try these check-in questions for your next meeting.
Build Rapport by Asking for Favors
The Benjamin Franklin effect is a cognitive bias that causes people to like someone more after they do that person a favor. If asking for a favor, aim to make it an easy one for the other person to complete, such as an introduction, feedback, or a quick brainstorming session.
Express Genuine Appreciation
Take a moment to recognize and appreciate the efforts of your colleagues or team members. Write a personalized thank-you note, acknowledge their contributions in meetings, or simply express gratitude verbally.
Foster Open Communication
Create a culture that values honest, open dialogue and encourage failure. Invite team members to share their thoughts, concerns, and all ideas without fear of judgment. Actively listen and validate their contributions.
Debrief Group Projects & Initiatives
Take time to talk about what worked and what didn’t. Acknowledge individual effort.
Life moves fast, and sometimes it feels like real connections are a rare occurrence, but they're the key to our happiness and fulfillment.
That's why it's time to take a leap of faith into creating intentional connections, starting with yourself. Get comfortable with your innermost thoughts, be vulnerable, chase your dreams, and set goals. Then, bring this same energy into the workplace by being a good listener, showing appreciation, and building friendships. Let's make a commitment to foster authentic, intentional connections, whether it be through a simple nod in the hallway or a heartfelt conversation with a co-worker. With this pledge, we aim to create communities where genuine relationships are the norm, not the exception!
